Reflections
on the last year
School starts a week from Monday and I am still
processing the last school year. I
needed this summer – to sleep, read, walk, rest, sit quietly and process.
There was so much
this year – so much good and hard, so much laugher so many tears, so many
euphoric highs and so many “depths of despair” (thank you Anne Shirley for the
creative vocabulary!). This year
was the hardest, most heart wrenching, delightful funny, learning experience.
I KNOW that a
sovereign God placed each of the twenty wiggly bodies in my class for a reason
- I needed to learn from them and
they from me. Y’all when I tell you, I know God had a plan, I am in NO way
saying it was an easy journey. It
was hard, I am talking about gut wrenching, ugly cry (you know the kind) hard.
But here is the
beauty – God was there with us in the middle of the ugly and hard. Never before have I been so aware of
His presence. He is faithful and
he worked beauty from a mess.
There was beauty in the middle of it - when things were still hard He gave me sweet
laughter. Not the mean kind – the
kind that brings relief and delight.
Everyday God sent laughter and here is the best part of the gift y’all,
every day he helped me notice and laugh too. It was a gift and a reminder that God was there and
working. I needed those reminders
to breath and enjoy and trust that He was working. The changes that happened day by day were not extraordinary,
but the sum total is breath taking.
It was hard work and God had a LOT of work he needed to do in my
heart. The Bible talks about how
God knows the end from the beginning (I know it is referring to way more then a
school year), what a reminder that God KNOWS. He knew exactly where this sweet class and I were headed,
even on days that I doubted that we were going to make it to Friday. And I am telling you, the end was
GLORIOUS!!! Not because it was the end, but because we, together, had come so
very far and through it all God was faithful.
Can you see why I
was tired? It was so hard, but I
am telling you that without a doubt it was my favorite year. You know how when you are reading a
really good book and there is character development all over the place and you
feel exhausted and euphoric but you ache at the end because it is over and the
story is done? That is how I am
feeling. This year was full of
growth in 20 little people and me.
Their hurts and triumphs became mine and this class crawled into my
heart and will forever have a place there. This class required an investment from me that I did not think
possible. They are ready to be
passed on to the next teachers, but my heart is reluctant to let them go. This class forever be a little bit “mine”!
So we have come to the final chapter of
this adventure for the 2012-2013 school year and here is what I know for
sure - the greatest lesson learned
this year– God is with us and cares.
He has plans to change us to better reflect him and to use us to love
others. It is not easy but He is
Good!
The
END
PS
Stay tuned for a new lessons and adventures beginning in about a week!
